Dan's other nose

Dan Holiday and I were chatting after he got off the air and was attempting a radio show when Dan brought up a health issue he had earlier today.  Dan said he was experiencing some pain on his cheek, which was also somewhat swollen.  He said he excused himself to the men's room to examine the offending area of his face when he discovered what appeared to be an ingrown beard hair.  I don't know what the medical term for this is but I know it can be painful.  My grandma used to complain of ingrown beard hair all the time when I was little.  She also sat around in her bra and gave herself perms, but that's another story for another time. Now that I think about it, that could be the reason I'm a little twisted.

Now being somewhat in the public eye it can be disturbing to a listener to see their favorite DJ for the first time and see what appears to be a second nose growing out of his cheek.  So, not wanting to appear disfigured in any way, Dan grabbed the only precision surgical intrument he could find, his finger nail clippers.  He said he got close to the mirror and gently pulled the beard hair from it's burrow and performed a quick visual inspection.  He noticed the knot on his cheek was still festering just a bit so he gave the little guy a squeeze and KABBBBAAAMMMM, it explodes like Mt. St. Helens onto the mirror.  Dan said he panicked at that point and was attempting to paper towel the mess when a fellow DJ, Shotgun Jaxon from Q104 walks in as Dan attempts to squeegee the massive flow of boil ooze off the mirror.  We laughed pretty hard that Shotgun was visibly nauseated by the site and was barely able to finish his shift.

The point of this story is to ask the question, don't adults have enough on their plates with wrinkles, hemmoroids, aging spots, thinning hair, the heartbreak of psoriasis, hot flashes, turkey necks, sagging ear lobes, various body fungus, uncontrollable flatulence, body parts sagging from the effects of gravity and hair growing everywhere but on our heads....why do we still have to put up with zits?  Zits are for teenagers.  Teenagers deserve zits.  It's their punishment for making fun of us for walking in the mall, which is the same thing they're doing, we're just wearing bright white walking shoes, pants pulled up to our chests and  the smell of Ben Gay trailing behind us.

This is what we talk about at work.  It's a sad, pitiful existence.