Sorry I blew up....

I love the Fourth of July!  I have been fascinated by fireworks as long as I can remember.  I used to practice in the off season with a stick and a fire in the old backyard trash burner.  That is until my Mom caught me and blistered the back of my legs with the same stick I had been playing in the fire with.  By  today's standards, she wouldn't be eligible for parole for another 5 or 6 years.  But by the standards of yesteryear, it was an important lesson for a young pyromaniac.

Anyway, back in the old days we always had the best fireworks.  M-80's that could blow up trash cans and mailboxes.  If you threw them in the river or lake, they would send a plume of water 50 feet into the air.  Black Cats that could blow a finger off.  Bottle rockets were used for neighborhood battles, and no  one ever lost an eye.  I guess maybe that was just luck.  Fireworks that,  by today's standards, and my neighbor's standards, would get you 10 years in prison if the police happened by. 

One year, on the fifth of July while leaving Branson Missouri, fireworks were on sale.  Bottle Rockets for five cents a gross.  I bought twenty dollars worth and filled up the back of the van.  It took me over ten years to shoot all those off.  Those were the days!

So, as the family sat on the back deck of the house, we shot off illegal bottle rockets, Roman candles and Black Cats.  I have always been known for my technique of shooting bottle rockets from my bare hands.  So, as a family tradition, I demonstrated my prowess by sending them off from my hand.  All was good until my son pointed out that I was on fire.  Indeed, my shirt had caught  some peripheral bottle rocket fall out and was blazing.  Luckily the flames were small enough that two glasses of tea and a cooler full of melted ice was all it took to put me out.  Did I learn my lesson?  What do you think.  Where are the roman candles!!!  I'll  be right back after I change into something less flammable!

That is all...Peters out!