Very Random Thoughts

 

My left back tire is square, I think. Pete Rose should be in the Hall of Fame. Put one computer hacker to death and I bet virus activity would slow down. Do you think elevators smell different to very short people? Why do I look different in a mirror than I do in photographs? John Denver may have been a genius. Does anyone know someone high up in the McDonalds Corporation?

 

When people honk at me I usually wake up and go thru the intersection as if I hadn't fallen asleep at the red light. I only do what I'm doing because NASA isn't hiring. Do you think selling roasted corn on the cob at carnivals would be a good way to make money...on the road?

 

I still only use a couple of fingers to type.  I think the light in the refrigerator goes out when you close the door.  I like crowds because a lot of people always show up for them.  I can pinpoint the exact date I ended a successful career.  Do you think the President has read the Constitution...of the United States?  I have friends whose kids are rocket scientists.  Is it so wrong to mouth the words "I love you" to the guy in the next car?  I am still having trouble getting used to wearing underwear. 

 

People think I'm not listening to them when I'm trying to think.  I tend to remember the good times and people of  my past.  I say hello to senior citizens everyday when they may not hear those words for days or weeks.  Most of them smile, some ignore me.  I have memorized where clean bathrooms are in my area of town.  I stopped hating needles a while back.  My cats like me because I take fish oil.  My dog likes me because I'm nice to her.  I sometimes wonder how far I could kick the other dog. 

 

Sometimes I remember intricate details of an event in my past and other times I can't remember my name.  I grew up in a blue house on 77th Avenue.  I accidently pee-d on an electric fence on a snowy day in ninth grade.  I can tell you who the first person I gave a ride in my corvair the day I got my license.  I feel lucky to have died once in my life.  My Dad hated rock and roll music, I still miss him.  Sometimes when I'm alone at home, I run though the house with scissors in my hand.  Can carnival life be that bad?  I can change my own disc brakes.  I once had a friend that drove his car in reverse to work to take miles off the car. 

 

I almost ran over a friend of mine after a graduation picnic because he had passed out in the street using the curb as a pillow.  In college, I was a bouncer at the Aquarius Lounge at 72nd and Pacific in Omaha.  I've been stabbed twice by a burglar, but I won the fight when I knocked him out with my ninth grade shop project.  My forehead is much larger than it used to be.  As I get older I realize that regularity isn't that bad of a conversation subject.  My very first girlfriend from 5th grade found me on Facebook.  The late Terry Mason, KOIL 1979, once told me he woke up that morning and his socks were wet. 

 

I loved being on the radio.  I miss being on the radio.  (sigh)

 

I'm really tired.  Have I been typing in my sleep again? Good Night.

 

That is all...Peters out!